A New Direction

This year has been a whirlwind. Most of the time my mind is swirling with what I have to do, difficult emotions in response to major life changes, boxes to be unpacked, children to educate, decisions to make, people to meet, the next meal to be made, major decisions to be processed and prayed for, packing for the next cross country trip, preparing physically and emotionally for our next guests, remembering what "home" we are going home to, trying to find peace and quiet and simple moments of quiet in the midst of all of that.

In November of this past year we made the decision and shared with our church and dearest friends we were moving. That set into motion a couple of months of packing, selling, a house, and saying goodbye to deeply loved people.

Then we moved across the country.

Lived out of suitcases for a month (and in a hotel and at different families houses).

Moved into a condo- with around 1/8 of our things for a few weeks.
Received more of our things and lived with around 1/2 of our belongings for 5 months.

During that time. We began a relationship with a new congregation. Continually meeting and getting to know new people, a new area, and some kind of new daily norm.

During those 5 months we had 5 different groups of people visit us. (which was sweet comforting relief and joy in a somewhat unsettled time).

We made 3 cross country trips (2 Louisiana, 1 Florida) and MANY shorter trips (Indiana, West Virginia, Toledo).

We re-habbed the church manse. Three weeks of many 12-14 hour days cleaning, hauling, painting, painting, painting, fixing plumbing, weeding, cleaning gutters, changing light fixtures, changing outlets, and much much more!

We moved AGAIN into the church manse.

We got MORE of our things from storage. So living now with around 3/4 of our belongings.

Joined homeschool groups. Met people.

Selected and ordered Curriculum for all three kids for our coming year.

Explored the area.

Tried to do school.

Supported Dan as he has initiated many changes and worked to understand the congregation and the dear people in the flock.

We were smacked in the face with cancer. Both Dan's mom and our brother in law were diagnosed with cancer within weeks of each other. Watching them suffer through intense cancer treatments and all that this disease brings to a person and their loved ones.

Emotions flood in and out of all of this. Bringing complexity to an already maxed out life situation. Excitement for the new. Anticipation of what God will do in this new call and joy at all he is already doing in the church and us. Sadness. Missing our Minnesota friends and our life there daily. Fear and pain for loved ones suffering physically. Major discomfort in not feeling settled and lacking a "normal" routine and sense of home.

And right in the middle of all of that we got a phone call.

All of our work, our hopes, our dreams for our African children ended. As I described in the previous post our agency informed all 50 families in the Ethiopia program we would need to move on. They could not guarantee the state of adoptions in Ethiopia would improve and they felt that the likelihood of us bringing home our children was slim.

We spent the next month processing and praying. We have long felt a burden for and calling toward Africa. So we explored any other possibility there. We found an agency out of Florida that we researched thoroughly and were ready to walk forward in their very new Uganda program. The day we decided to begin the woman I had been closely in contact with from that agency emailed and said they are pausing a bit in their Uganda program due to political circumstances surrounding international adoption there.

Ugh.

Discouragement was at an all time high in those days.

Our second choice was to explore the China program with our original agency. If we stayed at the agency we could transfer a bit more of the money we had paid into our Ethiopia program and we hoped there might be some ease with paperwork since we were already in their system.

I called and talked through the China program with their contact person. China is a special needs program. All children referred from China will have some form of a special need. Some very mild and correctable and other more severe.

We filled out a special needs preference form. To do this I had to research SO MANY medical conditions just to understand the words on the page in front of me! Then we had to mark the conditions we would be open to in our potential child. This is a strange and difficult thing to do. We  tended to mark conditions that were more mild or correctable. We have to be realistic with already having three children and believing we will adopt again in the future.

So I called the China contact from our original agency. I had 20 questions for her and expected a long and fruitful conversation. I was more than surprised when 2 minutes in she says "I have read through your special needs preferences and really I don't see any of these in the children I refer."

WHAT?! We marked 30 different conditions! And I have continually monitored child advocacy sites where I see kids with all of these conditions listed daily who are in need of adoption from China.

We fairly quickly and awkwardly ended our phone call and I just sat and cried.

So discouraged, so frustrated, so many questions.

I immediately decided I would just go on the child advocacy site "Rainbow Kids" and start inquiring about children on there. Each child on there is connected with an American agency looking to find a family for them.

I started sending messages about particular kids to different agencies. With 10 minutes I had an email from Amy at Lifeline Children's Services in Birmingham AL. Her message said, "I am around right now, any chance you are available to talk on the phone now?"

So I called.

And we were given hope and direction. She explained their China program and their agency. And as she talked I knew this was it. I had looked into Lifeline when we began our adoption journey 3 years ago for their Uganda program. They are a known and reputable Christian agency. Their China program is extensive and experienced. They have partnerships with MANY individual orphanages, and the government of China has such a good relationship with them they have entrusted them to privileged lists of children to advocate for. Their mission for their agency is motivated by their relationship with Christ and a vision to live out the Gospel. They do mission work in all of the countries they work in and most of the phone calls I have with anyone from Lifeline we pray before getting off and they encourage us from a place of mature faith.

I filled out an application that day.

We began the process of leaving our original agency and starting new with Lifeline. We were refunded some of the money we paid to our original agency.

For the most part it is like starting over. However 2 things are different and bring a bit of hope to an otherwise depressing task.

1. I have done this before. I have a sense for how to wade through the paperwork process. I know the terminology and we already have many of the needed materials from our previous paperwork.

2. China is significantly different than Ethiopia. China is a Hague country. This means they are a part of the Hague convention. It is an international convention that countries can become a part of if they meet certain criteria and its purpose is to help ensure ethical international adoptions. All of the children to be referred are already in the Chinese system and fully paper ready to have their adoptions  processed and be matched with families. Also China has been doing this for a long time and the process, the system and the timeline are predictable. Also in China adoptions you don't sit on a wait list with other families in the program. You are matched individually from the LARGE number of children already waiting for a family. You can be matched with a child anytime in the process, either now as we do the paperwork or after the paperwork is done and submitted. All of this gives us hope that the process will be faster, more predictable, and smooth.

It took me 6 months to complete all of the paperwork for our Ethiopia adoption. I am shooting for 4 months this time!

Right now I am again up to my ears in paperwork, meetings, checklists, trainings and jumping through hoops daily.

Our next step is to complete another home study. We have been accepted into a local agency who will complete the home study for us. Since Lifeline isn't in OH we have to find someone who will do the home study here and work with our Lifeline representative. We feel confident with this agency and other Lifeline families who live in OH have recommended them.

We would love your prayers.

I will be keeping this site updated as we walk through each step.

For now please pray for:

1. The paperwork to be smooth and gathered quickly.
2. For our home study. For the social worker that we will be assigned, each home visit, the paperwork for that, that timing would be quick.
3. For our future child.
4. That we would keep our eyes fixed on eternal things. That we would persevere and remain hopeful. For increased faith and trust in His good plan.